Dec 28, 2005

Have you ever experienced the crushing atmosphere of four young restless children in a small space for a long time, feeling all their childish exuberance? 

Have you ever felt the pressure of something new, really new?   These two situations like oil in lemonade would not, could not blend.

I would have given much for a quiet space to collect my thoughts, a space life chose not to afford me. 

There I was, seven hours of driving, pounding headache, the last fifteen miles down a winding road with several cars hanging off my bumper. 

Suddenly there are blue and red lights flashing, and the scream of sirens invading my pounding head.  Some neatly dressed man in his pressed uniform and fluorescently offensive jacket is signaling me to pull over.  In a state of complete and incomprehensible thoughtlessness he writes me a speeding ticket telling me that the tailgating traffic was no excuse for my ten km per hour speeding spree.  Incredibly he seemed oblivious to my four, by this time, totally unruly children, my pounding headache or my beautiful wife who was apparently lacking in beautiful praise for me in that moment. 

In that instant with the tools I had I could not have mustered a glimmering of the notion of surrender.  I am sure the last fifteen miles were pervaded with a thick, sticky silence that left everyone feeling just a little dirtier than they possibly could have felt after traveling for three days through the steaming swamps of the Darien gap.  That moment could be construed as a turning point in my life. 

Over the next ten years I embraced inner study as a way of life.  I learned the value of surrender and forgiveness.  I learned to breathe, I learned simple relaxation techniques, I learned to speak my needs and listen to the needs of others. 

Ten years later as I stood in the doctors parking stall in a new town I had recently moved to, with a light slowly dawning in my head that my car was gone, towed away, surrender did not even glimmer in my thinking; back to the books.

Another ten years have since passed by.  I continue to study, I continue to practice.  Do I yet know how to surrender?   In the moment, occasionally; with a little time I seem to.  When I discover how to find the humour surrender seems to finally finds completion.  Then I find a new opportunity to learn surrender.

May you find within yourself the strength to surrender to life's challenges in 2006.



Feb 2, 2005

We all like to live our lives in happiness, We don't do well with unresolved stuff. Yet many of us choose to be insensitive to our deeper feelings, we find ways and means to distract ourselves; television, music, work, it's a never ending list. The only difference for me may be my commitment to take ownership of my life AND my realization that all things can be resolved through an age old process called surrender and forgiveness. This is not new to this day nor I expect to you.

What may be new is the realization that this process is continuous. Forgiveness very simply is the practice of letting go, not to the things, people or the situations but rather to our attachment to them. Our attachment is emotional, it is our investment. Some of us build an investment in God through emotions of appreciation, joy and love. To speak the truth I must be in the truth. The truth very simply is all that is life promoting. So I must willingly release my needs to be right. I must surrender to an eternal presence within that always knows a peaceful way. I must do it to ensure growth in my life. The result of living this lesson that Jesus taught is empowerment and enrichment; and it also, for me, happens to be better talks. I know that this simple practice that works so well in my life will also work in your life if you embrace it. Blessings on your road to riches.

In Love and Light,